Here we Go Again...

The New York Times (I wont even try linking, as it requires a subscription) reported today that in the next six weeks before the midterm election they would be focusing on the Republican majority's failures in ... Education? No. Health Care? No. The Deficit? No. Energy Policy? No. Environment? No.

Iraq.

This is why I find it so very very hard to identify with the Democrats some days. Not for their values, but for their dumb-ass strategies. We lost the 2004 election pounding the electorate with negative messages over Iraq. Granted, far more people now realize that Iraq is, was and continues to be a mistake, but it is not a motivating issue for voters. Sorry to say it, but we already tried this and lost.

The other reason we lose by pounding the Iraq war is that there is no solution. We tried to pass pull-out resolutions earlier this term, and low-and-behold, we were labeled as cowards. Not a good plank to run on. Further, opposing Iraq war opens a rhetoric discussion which we lose not on the merits but on the sound-bites. We say, "Iraq was wrong." They say, hear and replay, "We dont care about our national defense." As much as you and I see through that as total B.S., we are not the voters in play here.

With strategies like these and the slowly decreasing price of petrol, Im losing confidence in this election. I need to start running campaigns.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Stay (Wasting Time)" Dave Matthews Band,
Before these Crowded Streets

Tired

Today seemed like a long day. Im pretty sure that it was.

I know that with my question to Justice Scalia brought a certain level of controversy into my life. I know that my participation in online forums discussing gay rights since that day have further opened the discussion. And I have largely been pleased with the supportive reactions of many of my friends. But to be honest, there are times when the educating that I do, the debating that I engage in, the tirades that I tolerate... it all becomes like a bandage ripping off a wound that I sometimes forget has not quite healed.

To some extent I had largely forgotten that there are people around me who judge me based on my sexuality. I get very comfortable around my friends, around those I trust. But wake-up calls occur, and as I said, I am the one who set the alarm for this particular wake-up. But that doesnt mean that I am not still exhausted.

This is why I love Milwaukee: The only city where you can walk into a bar and get your head shaved...

I spent this last weekend partying it up in Milwaukee. Anyone who knows me understands what that means for my liver.

We got in a little before midnight and my friends dropped me off, backpack and all, at the bar I used to work at. That place had become like my second home, and walking back in there made me miss my old haunt and my old friends very much. I was lucky enough to bump into the Owner and a couple of the other bartenders I used to work with. After hanging out with them for a little while, my favorite of them, known for his distinct Bitchiness, said something along the lines of, "Your hair is WAY too long... It makes me want to just attack your head with a pair of scissors." Hmmm... Okay!

Before I knew it, the Owner of the bar was using the bar scissors to remove chunks of hair from my head. As the event progressed, it became increasingly clear that I was just going to have to shave it all. It was totally worth it. My hair is now shorter than I have EVER had it, and actually looks pretty good.

But I know few other people who have gotten their heads shaved at a bar. There's seriously no place like Milwaukee.

I then hung out until about 4:30 at the dance club, drinking and reconciling with a surprising friend from the past.

The weekend was full of all sorts of other fun and debauchery, and the 5 hour car ride both ways with the belching, farting girls was all sorts of fun. Interesting conversation about how love gets harder as we pass through relationships and lose the faith and naivety of youth. Later a comment by myself about art in France: "The Louvre is just like the Mall of America. But with Art." Glad Im so cultured.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Wake Me Up When September Ends" Green Day,
American Idiot

Today, Justice Scalia Spanked Me

Justice Scalia came to our law school today. He started with some quick comments about why he is smarter than everyone else and then moved into question and answer. I was the first questioner:

Question: In reading Lawrence v. Texas and Romer v. Evans I largely agreed with your judicial reasoning, but I had trouble looking past the scathing language you used and the stereotypes you cited into the record. Mr. Justice, do you believe that, as a member of the United States Supreme Court, you have the intellectual responsibility to look past gross stereotypes of communities of people, rather than reinforcing them as you did in Romer v. Evans by stating that gay and lesbian communities are largely affluent and centered in distinct areas of the country? And if you don't (interrupted)

Justice Scalia: I think they may have been erroneous, but not stereotypes...

Me: I would contend they can be both.

Justice Scalia then proceeded to explain his judicial philosophy in Romer (which hadnt been my contention) and then insult my question as a "When did you stop beating your wife?" ... I felt a bit sore about it for about 20 minutes before I realized that I had a) managed to get a Supreme Court Justice to have to avoid a question and b) just gotten spanked by a Justice of the highest court of our land. As a second-year law student, I can walk away from that my head held high.

Part of my reasoning behind the question was less about the answer, but more about the question itself. I dont want (My School) to be seen as the place where men like Scalia can come and vent their bile without ever being challenged. When you cut through his humor, he spent 90% of the time making fun of anyone who disagreed with him. In retrospect, I am proud to be among the ridiculed.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Polaris" Jimmy Eat World,
Futures

(UPDATE: Although I had more than a few people at school avoiding making eye contact with me for my perhaps brazen tactics, I also had a few who came up and thanked me for having the guts to ask the question others may have been afraid to. I have never been afraid to confront authority. Why start now?

Still feeling a little awkward about the spanking I had received, I went to into work. I love this place. As I told my story to a few co-workers, I started getting high-fives.... I went to tell my supervisor about the whole thing, and she said, "Oh, Justice Scalia is in town? I thought I felt loathing eminating from that area of the city." I then told her about my question, at which point she marched me into the Big Boss, who said, "Let me shake your hand. Congratulations for having that kind of courage." He also noted that Justice Scalia's little rip at me at the end of his answer only indicated that he felt threatened by the astutness of my question.

I love my workplace.)

This Just In: QUIET PLEASE!

Sooo... This just got printed in our inter-school updates:

"Library Quiet Policy: Please remember that the entire library is considered a quiet zone, with the exception of the second floor area next to Circulation. We are a professional community, and we expect each member of our community to be respectful of others as they study in the library. We encourage you to remind each other of the need for quiet. If one or more of your colleagues continues to be disruptive, you are welcome to contact library or public safety staff. Library staff will also be making more regular visits to all floors of the library. We hope these steps will reduce the noise level very quickly, but we will continue to follow up and make sure that quiet zones remain quiet."

This is the direct result of a 1L student who not only got in the faces of a bunch of upperclassmen because the upperclassmen were enjoying themselves (as they have for the last two years) in their normal study spaces. This kid got all aggravated that people were talking, and went and told a librarian. When the librarian intervened, one of the upperclassmen approached the 1L to apologize and explain that the same students had studied, albeit noisily, on that floor for two years, and the 1L might want to find a new place to study if it bothered him (believe me, we do not want for study spaces in this building). The 1L then proceeded to insult the upperclassmen in all sorts of ways. Other upperclassmen intervened, and the 1L went to a Dean and tattled that people had "threatened him." Yes... A gang of rebel law students had "threatened" him in the mutha-fukin law library. Okay...

Im starting to agree with my new favorite blog in describing some of these 1Ls as "douchetastic douchenozzles."

A little environmental ranting...

Hey there. The world is ending. Do something. And try not to drive yourself while you do it.

I read a beautiful article, "If only gay sex caused global warming."

"NO ONE seems to care about the upcoming attack on the World Trade Center site. Why? Because it won't involve villains with box cutters. Instead, it will involve melting ice sheets that swell the oceans and turn that particular block of lower Manhattan into an aquarium.

The odds of this happening in the next few decades are better than the odds that a disgruntled Saudi will sneak onto an airplane and detonate a shoe bomb. And yet our government will spend billions of dollars this year to prevent global terrorism and … well, essentially nothing to prevent global warming."

Its worth reading.

Interesting from a psychological perspective how we (and by we, I mean a GOP-run government) are not smart enough as a human species to take steps to prevent something as oncoming and threatening as this problem.

Meanwhile, "many of Earth's lifeforms are far more sensitive to subtle climate changes than us temperature-controlling, high-tech-home-dwelling humans, and some scientists fear that the planet is poised to lose 10-50% of its species. Global warming is introducing temperatures that haven't been felt in 24 million years. 'We may very well already be on the breaking edge of a wave of mass extinctions.'" Thanks Towleroad.

Then there is also the fun news ice is melting at unprecedented rates in the North Pole. There goes Santa. "This situation is unlike anything observed in previous record low-ice seasons. It is highly imaginable that a ship could have passed from Spitzbergen or Northern Siberia through what is normally pack ice to reach the North Pole without difficulty. If this anomaly continues, the Northeast Passage, or 'Northern Sea Route' between Europe and Asia will be open over longer intervals of time, and it is conceivable we might see attempts at sailing around the world directly across the summer Arctic Ocean within the next 10 to 20 years."

And the most recent:
"Global Warming: Polar bears drowning due to melting Arctic icepack; Gore says tax pollution, not payrolls; Bush officials tried to suppress federal scientist from discussing the link between global warming and hurricanes." Thanks Towleroad.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Dont Drink the Water" Dave Matthews Band,
Before These Crowded Streets

Want to know what its like to have two Dads?

Doesnt seem like this kid minds much. Ahhh... Europe.

Today I officially became a Christian

Granted, I have officially been "Catholic" since the 8th grade, but that's neither here nor there.

At 8:45 this morning, I officially took on the name that you all know (and love?) me by. I have gone by "Christian" for over 6 years now, and it was just time to make that official. I didnt realize how important this would be for me until I was standing in front of the judge, shaking a abit in anticipation. It was actually really exciting. Standing there saying, "This is who I am, who I want to be."

Nice way to start a day.

In Honor of National Talk Like a Pirate Day

Seriously one of my favorite holidays!

My pirate name is:

Red William Rackham

Passion is a big part of your life, which makes sense for a pirate. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

Margaritas at the Office

I just bumped into my boss for the first time in a while. Actually, to say that he is my boss is a bit of a jump. He's my boss' boss' boss. So he's perhaps a few ranks up there. Anyway, it reminded me of an interesting story I have yet to share:

About a week back, we had our Mexican Independence Day celebration at the office with a salsa and guacamole competition and margaritas starting at 3pm. It was a total blast, but I may have learned a quick and dirty lesson about drinking at the office. Then again, I may not have.

I think that my comments had far more to do with being bone-headed than they had to do with Tequila, but Im sure the Tequila helped.

I'm standing with some of the newer attorneys, chatting about things, when someone mentions that one of the Profs at her old law school slept with one of the students. Halfway through the story, the Big Boss joins the conversation, and we are all kinda joking about the situation. And I say blithely, "Well, isnt that every student's dream, to hook up with one of their Professors?" My Big Boss turns to me and says, "Umm... Christian, you realize I teach at your school, right?"

Ummm. Awkward?

Better still was when he later walked into a conversation I was having with a few of the female senior attorneys about shaving our legs.

Yep. Tequila at work is a good idea. I cant wait for the Wine and Cheese party next Friday.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Hello Again" Hoobastank,
Hoobastank

This is why I freakin LOVE Spain!

God I miss this place.

Two Air Force Privates Wed in Seville, Spain

This is precisely why, whenever someone starts going on about "America as the Greatest Country on Earth" I start feeling like a debate.

Right now, Spain seems like the place to be.

Closing Credit Cards

Now that the student loans have come in, and I have had the chance to pay off most of the debt from this last summer, it is once again time to close off some credit cards. Why exactly is it that while you HAVE a credit card, it feels like you are being gang-raped by a toolbox, but when you finally want to close a card, it is like you are clubbing a baby seal?

"Well, we at Discover have enjoyed our relationship, and we're sorry to see you go."

Fuck yeah you've enjoyed the relationship. Glad one of us has. Geez.

Funny, the last time I was on the phone with Discover I was trying to figure out why my interest rate had suddenly skyrocketed. "Not a whole lot I can tell you. I think your intro rate is just over..." Gee thanks... It was June, and my intro rate was NOT over... At that point, I was carrying a decent amount on the card, knowing that I had a Zero percent rate until October of this year, and had paid meticulously on time so that I wouldnt lose that rate. Then, all of a sudden, Im paying 25% on WAY too much balance. I freaked, opened a new card with a new intro rate for Zero, and paid $80 to transfer the balance. Shit.

So tonight I call Discover:

Sweetest Operator on Earth who likens my closing my account to Kitten Genocide: "Can I ask why you would like to close your account?"

ME: "Cause ya'll jacked up my rate on me, and I got screwed and scared and took my money elsewhere."

SOE: "That's just horrible. Well, I can take your rate back down now, if I can get you to come back to us, we'd hate to lose you..."

ME: (inner monologue) OMG YOU FUCKING HATEFUL BITCH! I HATE YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR!!! (actually spoken) Ummm... No. Thanks though.


Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Drop Dead Gorgeous" Republica,
Republica

This Alcohol paid for by the Minnesota State Government

So. Alcohol is one of the only things that keeps law students sane. That is a well proven, infallible truth. It allows us to flush out the mental anguish of a semester/week/day/morning without the psychoanalysis that would surely only serve to crush our spines with additional debt. But my alcohol usage is now measurable on another level: economic.

I am still working as a clerk at my government job from the summer. I love it, but I am now half-time at government pay, which doesnt come out to all that much. Nonetheless, I got paid this last Friday and was happily looking forward to the added bump in my financial fitness.

I went to go check my statement this morning, and saw no change from earlier this week. "Hmmm... That's wierd," I think to myself. I go to see what's up.

Yep, I got paid.

Oh.

Turns out that in the last 5 days or so, I have drank enough to nullify this week's paycheck. That's a lot of beer. Granted, I threw a party last night, and am on a Social Committee charged with pulling off all the school's many parties (which can also get expensive), but that's still a lot of beer.

Good thing: Im not drinking myself into indebtedness.

Bad thing: Well, I really dont see a downside here, actually. I cant possibly think of anything more worthwhile or valuable for me to spend my money on right now, so rock on, I guess. I'll just have to remember to thank the State of Minnesota for funding my binge drinking. (looks like Pawlenty missed that when he was "balancing the budget... hahahaha... sucker)

BOOOO!!!

The "coffee date" turned into a "platonic, show you around my corporate office" thing. Booo!!! I dont know how this turned out like that. Booo!!!

Damnit. I was excited about this thing too.

Ready

Wow... Here's a good feeling.

For the first time in about a month, I feel like I am ready for the day ahead of me. I have had an astoundingly busy few days for the last while, and I feel like I am reeling a little from it, but am recovering quickly. Allow me to take note: I can do this. All of this. Its always nice to have moments like this. You need them, otherwise the despair can overtake you faster than you might imagine.

But I made it. Im still standing. I am heading toward another work-filled weekend, but Ive resigned myself to the normality of that mediocre fact. But I will make it to that weekend, catch up and be just fine. Then to another week... But I'll make it. That's nice to know


Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"El Amor de Mi Vida" Ricky Martin,
La Historia

Coffee Date

Just too bad I dont drink coffee...

Soo, I have a coffee date with a super cute guy that I met while I was in Duluth two weekends ago. I met him through a friend at the super quaint Pride festivities, and next thing I know, he is being adorable on stage with some lesbians toddler. Totally melted me right then and there... Since I didnt really know him and am somewhat gutless with guys, I determined to get his phone number later that night.

At the bar, I saw him again, and we started chatting. He goes to the MBA program right across the street from my school, and I invited him to participate in our LGBT/Ally group. He gave me his email, and then ended up coming to our first meeting (which I ended up leading... looking all "authoritative" as my friends put it). Well, after a couple quick emails yesterday and today, and two very very busy schedules, it looks like we are making time to grab coffee on Thursday. Im all giddy. It's cute. I'll update with how it goes.

Its interesting. For how much I screw around, I dont date much. I forget how much fun ACTUALLY getting to know someone can be.


Musical Fodder for my Writing:
No Music: ITunes is updating

A day of High highs and Low lows...

Hey there. Long time no write. School's been busy. Life's been fun. Time to regain some sanity, time to write down some of whatever is sloshing around in my head. And there's a lot of it.

I woke up this morning to a gray and drizzly day. Perfect for the day of work I had ahead of me. I had slept well, and was on my way to getting done some of the Sunday work I had to do when I got hit with a (Mitchell) moment. It has been months since I have had one. I broke up with him nearly a year ago, and I had thought I was over these sort of emotional lapses. Apparently not. Perhaps it was the fall-ish weather that I was seeing, or the idea of settling into another school year of hard work and virtually no dating opportunities, but I got suddenly heartwrenchingly lonely.

On the plus side, I had hidden the photos of (Mitchell) so well that it took me a full 20 minutes to find them. But find them I did. Shit.

There is nothing quite so humbling as to be reminded of your own emotional ineptitude in the middle of all that is going on in your life. I live in a very controlled world, with a lot of controlled things to do, and not a whole lot of variables to throw me off. I kinda like it that way. And to have something from over a year ago still make me feel like I was pushed into highway traffic is truly a reminder of my own humanity.

So, I listened to some music, teared up a little, then made my way to my Cite check for the Law Journal. And if I didnt hate my life before...

From 11am till 4pm I was busy with the mind-wrenchingly painful and meticulous task of finding and correcting errors in Law Journal articles. It actually took my mind off my emotional turmoil of the moment, and I work with some stellar people, so I cant complain too much, but it does suck a lot. I got one article done, with only one more to do next weekend. I guess that's progress.

After a short nap at home I felt better. Sarah and I made our way to the Nickel Creek concert on St. Harriet Island. For those of you who dont know, Nickel Creek is easily one of my favorite bands ever, and this was my third or fourth time seeing them. I actually have one of the guitar picks from the first concert I went to. Im very proud, as I managed to fight off a crowd for it, and, in particular, push over an old man to get it. This concert was even more important to me as it will probably be my last chance to see this band before they split up next year (as was nnounced earlier on their fan listserve--yes, Im that big a fan) (interestingly, for the first time I have seen them there was visible/audible tension between Chris and Sarah. Interesting...) Anyway, the concert was amazing. It was outside, and a bit chilly, but their music was phenominal as always. Sara Watkin's voice is like honey melting into the breeze. Chris Thile had a ton of energy, which always makes their shows a blast. Anyway, I loved it, and grinned like a child the entire time. What a great way to distract myself.

Then, after the concert, I managed with some effort to get the pick SIGNED!!! Chris Thile came over and scribbled on it, and I was giddy like a school girl. Now I just have to figure out what to do with the pick: braid it into my hair, have it embedded into my skin? I seriously love this band that much.

It was an amazing end to an otherwise rather crappy day, and I was very glad to have the companionship of Sarah at the concert and afterward. Definitely helps.

Okay, to bed. Need to update later about Duluth, school, the first bar review, OUTLaw, my newest crush, margaritas at work, and all sorts of other fun stuff.

Musical Fodder for my Writing:
"Somebody More Like You" ARTIST,
Why Should the Fire Die