Twice on Sundays

Didnt do much of anything. I think my sickness is catching up to me sleep-wise. But I am finally feeling less miserable. Thank God. I really didnt think I was going to make it there for a little while.

I went and watched Adam play softball today. The point was really to get out of the apartment and meet some new people, but I didnt really hit it off with anyone. I did, however, realize that I could easily join a team next year without embarrassing myself. I talked to (Mitchell) later and he said that we could play on a team together... Either if I return to Milwaukee or... the "other option." The idea of next summer already has me giddy. Is that healthy?

Friday night was mostly centered on me throwing together a BBQ for a bunch of my law school friends. Very Very casual, about 12 people, just chilled and grilled out at my place. It was very nice. I had FAR too much meat, as I over estimated people's appetites. I guess I am far too used to the college scene, where if you offer food, people come in droves with voracious appetites. I had Ted help out with the grill (after which he gave me a shoulder rub... what? not normal straight-boy activity). After everyone dispersed, Ann and I cleaned up and watched and Angel episode and CAMP. Fun night. I was exhausted though... I mean, I cut up my own cheese platter and made my own potato salad. That is some major entertaining right there.

The week had been tough. I think I mainly didnt write because I didnt want to vocalize how negative everything seemed. Kinda a karma thing about putting that sort of negativity into the air. Tuesday, the day that I went back, was one of those days that everything that could go wrong did. Between a 9am call that I had bounced a 5-figure check to hearing that I was rejected from the volunteer position at the Women's Shelter because I am a man (actually its becuase they had already filled the spot, but I didnt find that out until later) and walking into my Contracts classroom to find anti-gay biblical interpretation written on the board and having to interupt the Prof to have it removed. All that combined with feeling incredibly and debilitatingly sick... Yuck. I ended the day by breaking down in the MJF coordinator's office. Great. The second week of classes and I am already crying in the principal's office.

The week got better. With the help of many long distance friends, and bitch-festing it on the phone with (mitchell) I survived. I think the thing is that the stuff going on in my life is small stuff. Small and crappy to be sure, but small stuff. But without the support that I grow so used to in my communities (most recently Marquette) I end up feeling very alone in a world where the small crap is piling up around me. Fortunately though, I feel like I am quickly establishing a group of people here that I can share the little stuff with. I ended up having a meeting with the Dean about the anti-gay thing. He was incredibly supportive, and I held my cool.

Now that it is the weekend, I have just some basic reading and catch-up to do, along with some organizing in my room. As much as it sucks to be away from the boy this weekend, it is really nice ot have the time to just chill and get life organized. Maybe I will finally write those thank-you cards I have been meaning to send.

As for this week, it will be a busier week. I will have to get reconnected to a new volunteer site, I am meeting with my mentor again on Tues (8am!! yuck!) watching the 8th Federal Circuit Ct. of Appeals on Thursday all morning, and I suppose starting a Student Government race. It is kinda funny: going out to the bars and talking with people, various classmates have approached me as "the shu-in" candidate. Between my little "You're Jewish" fiasco last week bringing me certain notarity, and just being a loud-mouth, I guess that I have made a mark for myself already. One girl was talking about how she was going to have to make tshirts and buttons and poster if she was going to "compete" with me. There are 4 spots, and I have actually been encouraging people to run because I dont want to get stuck working with the social outcasts of the class just by default. But there will be no tshirts or buttons. Probably not even posters. I dont think i care that much about winning. To be sure, I would care about the position, but that's a different thing. Anyway... I need to sleep now. Cuddle up to my "versatile pillow" that I imagine is (Mitchell).

Oh... and for my own sanity... reference private diary from this day