Moving On

Good God... Its been almost a month since I have last posted. Wow... Its not that I have been busy, although I have, but more I have been happy. I guess I tend to write more when Im pensive, and Im more pensive when Im meloncholy-ish. Spring has sprung, I have found some fantastic people to surround myself with who care deeply for me, and I feel much more myself than I have in a while. Roo-Raah!

This weekend is the first one I have spent in town for a while. Last weekend I went home for Easter, which was lovely. Every time I go back to TC I find that there are fewer and fewer people there for me. With the (important) exception of Jeff & Dick, I spent the weekend entirely with Dad and Carey. The night I got home we all stayed up till 3am just catching up, and I was amazed at their talent for making me laugh.

The weekend before that I went to Milwaukee to see a friend before he shipped out to Iraq. It was a wonderful trip, and I realized how much I am actually attached to that city. I thought it was Marquette, (Mitchell), or my awesome friends there, but it turns out that it is something far more basic: I miss the familial way I am greeted at the bars, by people all over. Its just so much more blue-collar (read: less stuck-up). I got a chance to visit with a ton of people, including a quick visit with Justine. Phenominal!

It is nice to be in my apartment this weekend though. I am getting my fun out of the way before I buckle down for exams, which start this week. I just wish I could fast-forward these weeks and get to summer. Went clubbing with Kenz and Anthony on Friday to two of the most fun clubs I've been to in a while. The second one was probably the best gay bar Ive been to in the U.S. ... Although I could have just been wasted. Then Saturday I watched "V for Vendetta" (amazing flick) and then went on a boat cruise down the Mississippi with Kenz and a my law school group. It was odd because I would have felt very lonely without Kenz there. I just dont feel like a part of the law school crowd right now. The guys are all guy-ey, and the girls are... well I just dont feel real close with them right now. Anyway, Kenz and I ended up talking about some very deep things and it was just wonderful to have her there.

The reason I titled this entry "moving on," is because I have totally been in freshman mode this year. After years of working for orientation and making new homes for myself in various countries, you'd think Id be better at recognizing this process. Freshman (or 1L) year you get thrown into a mix of people who you pressume you need to be best friends with. But after some months of trying to really work these relationships of convenience, we all realize that, while convenient, these people may not really have anything in common with you. They may not make you feel good about yourself or have the qualities that you generally surround yourself with. I went through this in a major way my freshman year. Carey is finding that right now too. She is having a rough go at school feeling like she hasnt made any "real" connections with some of the girls she has been hanging with all year.

Anyway, now that I recognize that this has been something that I have been struggling with, I also see that I am coming out of it. There are people I am choosing to hang out with more, others less. I'll still have my drinking buddies, but it's definitely nice to know that I am finding people who I can rely on for more than that.

So, now it is heading into exams, so it may well be another month before I write. I'll try not to do that. Oh... and for those who might have been thinking about it, DO NOT upgrade your Hotmail accounts with their new beta software. It sucks. Trust me.

But Ive moved on.